gift/curse 11/23/23

i see the obvious.  everyone creates their own lives.  i was vilified and blamed by my family for their unhappiness.  and i chose familiars who treated me the same.  

and i didn't know how to change so i've been listening to subliminal recordings on you tube.  success.  jane thanked me in front of everyone for connecting her to the mexican chocolate from the market deli.  she did all the leg work.  my family demanded i fulfill all their desires without thanks, respect or even simple acknowledgment.  i was their invisible slave/genie of the lamp.  and they abused me to keep me enslaved.  i grew up expecting abuse and chose people to lie and abuse me.  

i don't have to know how.  i'm grateful subliminal re programming works.  

i'm better

life is clearer.  not just because i use the descriptive soundtrack.  it's been tough.  i have to keep reminding myself i still have a job to do.  as i raise my energy vibrations i raise the planet and the universe.  

my flock

i've collected my flock.  jonathon livingstone seagull finds his flock i created mine.  well, i sat and they gathered.  a group of accepting inclusive people.  most groups use criticism and exclusion as a bonding agent that ultimately destroys the group.

like st. expury 'little prince' tames the fox.  

autists feel more.  live on feeling.  overload frequently to inactivity.  i have to constantly be my own cheerleader.  it's what i do for others too.